15 Things You Say To Yourself While Driving

Other drivers may not be able to hear you, but you know you said it. Here are 15 things you end up saying every time you get behind the wheel.

1. “Please turn. Please turn.”

FOX / Via

FOX / Via

The guy in front of you is creeping along at a snail’s pace. For the love of all things please get out of my lane!

2. “Oh, snap! Now this is my jam!”

You put your iPod on shuffles and all of the sudden a long lost favorite comes on. Time to get down on the get down.

**Be forewarned, you could end up Rick Rolling or doing the one man Harlem Shake. 

3. “Alright buddy, you’re going to need to back the truck up.”

MTV / Via

MTV / Via

Why this guy is tailing you is beyond explanation, but he needs to calm down.

4. “Where’s the fire?!”

Is there some reason as to why you’re going a bajillion miles an hour? We all have places to be!

5. “OMG are we there yet?!”

Paramount Pictures / Via

Paramount Pictures / Via

You’ve had to pee for the last hour or so. There comes a time when a decision to stop must be made.

6. “Don’t make me come back there!”

Comedy Central / Via

Comedy Central / Via

Whether there are fighting little kids or annoyingly loud friends, if you have to pull this car over, you’re going to lose it.”

7. “They better be where they say they are…”

Disney / Via

Disney / Via

At the airport or middle school, those rent-a-cops take the loading zone seriously. No stopping! Their butts better be ready and waiting.

8. “Shut up buddy, we all have places to be.”

Is your horn broken or are you just blind? It’s a traffic jam. Get over it.

9. “Look natural, everything is just fine.”

Even if you’re doing absolutely nothing wrong, passing a cop instantly makes you feel like a criminal.

10. “I can’t find the street address, better turn down the volume.” 

BBC / Via

BBC / Via

For whatever reason, it is absolutely essential that you turn down the music while trying to read home addresses. If your co-captain doesn’t respect that, give them a one-way ticket to the backseat.

11. “Oh, gross!”

FOX Searchlight Pictures / Via

FOX Searchlight Pictures / Via

You look over and see two people mackin’ it in the car next to you. Hey! Let’s see those hands at 10 and 2!

12. “Woah! My bad, bro!”

You were just trying to pass a slowpoke, but they clearly have some serious rage issues. Lesson learned.

13. “Are you serious?! That was my spot!”

FOX / Via

FOX / Via

You don’t know where this person cam from or how they managed to weasel into your spot, but you are silently, but decidedly, wishing them ill.

14. “Oh haaaaaay!”

Cutie at the stop light! Time to subtly look over and smile!

15. “Oh man, I hope they can’t hear my music.”

Columbia Pictures / Via

Columbia Pictures / Via

Careful! Just because the windows are rolled up doesn’t mean that sound can’t escape the car and damage your street cred irreparably.

What do you think?